Monthly Archives: August 2008

Movie Review: High School Musical

Spoiler Alert!

Well I did it. I saw High School Musical. After months, maybe a year of begging, Ryan finally rented this through Netflix. His previous excuse was that the movie was rented out at Blockbuster. Thanks Netflix!

So I’m super excited when Ryan gets three Netflix movies in the mail and he tells me to open them. “High School Musical!” YES! “I’m so watching this after Olivia goes to bed,” I thought.

So I pop the movie into our DVD player. I skipped through about 6 Little Mermaid/Blues Clues/Bambi IV/Fox & Hound: Fox Realizes He Can Kill Hound previews. The movie begins…

First scene: Caucasian Dad & son playing basketball on an indoor court at night. Mom walks in all gussied up, asking why they’re not ready for “the New Years Eve party.” The parents go one way and the son goes the other after making a “I’m too good for this S!@#” look.

Next scene: Hispanic family. Mother grabs book out of daughter’s face. Tells her that she needs to go be social instead of being a bookworm as usual. “Go have fun!” she insists. The daughter gives an equally “I’m too good for this S!@#” look.

So apparently both familes are at the same winter lodge for New Years where the adults go to one party and the raging, hormonal, pizza & fries eating teens are sent to another area where the DJ spins great songs of the ’60’s. Karaoke time! Who’s going to sing? The two “Too good for this S!@#” teens are so unenthused. Uh oh! Spotlight’s on them! They better get up and sing this next little ditty or else everyone’s going to laugh at them! They both get up and go to the stage, mics in hand. The music fades up. The guy starts singing, then the girl follows suit. Apparently they both know the lyrics to this horrible Michael McDonald-esque tune and the teen audience goes buck wild, throwing their awkward bodies around like those inflatable dancing guys at the car dealership.

Song over. The two teenybops introduce themselves and hang the rest of the night. They take pics of each other with their cell phones and promise to call each other. The girl runs off abruptly, while the dude’s left hanging. Meet Troy & Gabriela.

Woo Hoo! First day of school after the break! Troy’s back to school and we find out he’s the king of the basketball team. There’s a new girl at the school who nobody knows. I recognize that face! Gabriella! Where ya been? Do you have a cousin named Sandy from Australia and is she dating a Danny Zuko?

So this is when I lose total interest and the movie becomes a total Grease rip-off, but with modern cell phone technology.

The only thing you need to know about the rest of this movie: Troy’s basketball buds give him hell because he’s thinking about trying out for the High School Musical (oh yeah, that’s what this is about), cause he and Gabriella had such chemistry when they sang before, and she’s thinking about trying out too. Athletes don’t sing and dance! Oh yeah, hot shot? Then how do you explain this litte queer (as in gay..as in happy) dog & pony show that happens in the middle of practice??

And what about the championship? It falls on the same day, same hour, same second as the musical.

So some more drama happens when Gabriella’s debate club friends decide they don’t want her participating in the musical because it falls on the same day, same hour, same second as the big debate.

CONFLICT!

So basically Troy & Gabriella’s teams try to screw them over by sheer trickery. Troy & Gabriella find out what happens, get the main parts in the school play, then do some gay (as in happy…really really happy) dance in the gym after they forgive their friends.

High School Musical gym:

Grease gym:


Rating: FAIL!

Can’t wait until Valentines Day when I can distribute these goodies:

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